I think I must have a sign on my head that says "Randoms: talk to me"

1. Man in Scotmid

There's a supermarket a few minutes walk from our flat called Scotmid. (I love the name, don't know why). It closes at 10pm every night - handy - and about a week ago, I walked down to get some milk just before they shut. As I was standing at the checkout, this guy right behind me starts talking quite loudly to the guy behind the counter. He was middle-aged, dressed in a suit, with a laptop bag, but kind of all dishevelled. Something about him wasn't quite right. He was just loud enough to be a little wierd, but all friendly-like, so no real bother. He seemed familiar to the shop staff - as thought they were used to him starting random loud conversations in their supermarket. His conversation with one shop assistant turns to his (the shop assistant's) girlfriend, as it seems he had been having some problems with her. And inevitably, I get drawn into the conversation... "Girls don't like it when you open the door for them do they?" he asks loudly. "Hmm, I'm not really sure", I politely answer. Of course then the accent gives me away, and he's like "Where are you from?". I tell him. "What are you doing here, are you working?". I tell him, as vaguely, but not rudely, as possible. He tells me all about his 3 BAFTA nominations, how he went to school with Irvine Welsh, he teaches at the university and a bunch of other stuff of other stuff I can't remember. I say "oh, that's... umm... very... good". Then I'm like, "ok, I'll be going then". The guy kinda grabs my arm, not roughly, "Don't go yet", he says. A slight shiver of panic waves through my spine. But there's security guards and lots of people around in the shop, so its ok. Then they turn the shop lights off and kick everyone out, because its 10pm. I find myself walking out with the random into the street. Mental stocktake: I have only about 10 pounds on me and my flat keys, but no mobile. No-one knows I'm here. Fantastic. I'm thinking, I have to play this one verrrrry carefully. I hedge, trying to see which way he's going to walk, and its the same way as me. He says " where are you going". I say "Ohhhh, just up there". He keeps talking a million miles per hour, walking along as though we were old friends. I'm internally freaking out. And then after a few minutes, he stops and puts out his hand to shake mine, says "lovely to meet you, all the best". And he walks off down the side street.

2. Euro guy

The next afternoon, I'm walking down my street with my ipod on after just getting off the bus, and I feel a tap on my shoulder. I spin around, and there's this guy standing there - he looks kinda northern euro, well dressed in a neat northern european sort of way. He very politely asks me asks me to take a picture of him in front of a building. He explains he's been living there and is leaving to go back home the next day. Of course I agree, take his camera and step backwards ready to frame the photo. Then the guy reaches inside his bag and pulls out one of these...



A novelty scottish tartan hat with bizarre shaggy red "hair" attached, commonly called a see-you-jimmy hat. He puts the hat on, and then does this half squat stance, with two thumbs up, elbows out - can you picture it? If he was in aus-land, he would have been saying "maaaaaate" with a tinny in one hand. It completely caught me by surprise, and I totally lost it, shrieking with laughter and can hardly hold the camera still. This perfectly normal, mild-mannered guy suddenly transformed before my very eyes into a euro-scot yob. I took a couple of photos of him, then gave the camera back and he left. I'm kicking myself that I didn't have my camera to take my own shot of him.

3. Crazy black guy

Friday night we had a bit of a meet-and-greet (read: drinking session) at the main Assembly venue for all the tech staff. I was stuck at work until well after it was underway, it was about 10pm before I arrived, the streets were full of drunken crazies and I was on foot. I put my head down and powered through it all. Next minute, this guy appeared in front of me with his arm out, inviting me to link my arm with it. He's African, black as anything, wearing an almost luminescent pink-and-white striped white, and he has this big wierd grin on him face. I say no thanks, I'm ok. He persists. No, really, I'm fine. Again polite but firm. He persists, and its getting embarrassing, so I link my arm with his and walk along the street. I was only about 50 metres away from the theatre anyway, and lots of people (albeit drunk) around. Then the usual where are you from, why are you here line of questioning, I tell him I'm working at Assembly Rooms (not true). He wants to know what shows are on (there's like hundreds), so I say "Oh quite a few". Then he wants to know exactly where I will be because he will come back to visit. That's impossible to say, in there somewhere, I say. He's not being threatening, just annoying. I extract my arm as we appoach the Assembly and then he starts going on about how men and women should be friends more, that people don't talk to each other on the street, blah blah blah. I'm like "that's nice, have a nice life and I'll be going now". And off he goes.

4. Taxi driver

Taxi drivers in Edinburgh don't mind a bit of a chat. Nothing unusual there really. Anyway, last night I was so buggered after work that I caught a cab home, and it all started when a couple of deaf people crossed the road whilst we were stopped at the lights. He pointed them out, and seemed quite generally fascinated by their signing. I asked him if he'd seen deaf people laughing, how they make a "laughing" sign with their hands, kinda like a bird's beak. He laughed at this like it was the funniest thing he'd ever heard. He seriously was laughing so much that I was worried he couldn't see where he was driving. Once he'd calmed down, its the usual questions. He asked if I knew about - of all things - Chopper Read. "Umm, yeah, I know a bit about him". Then he proceeds to recite lines from the film in his best Aussie accent, which I have to say, wasn't all that bad. I tell him that Chopper is a painter now. He tell me that Chopper lives in Tasmania. I sense that he knows a little too much about Chopper Read, so I pay and get out of the cab. He yells out through the window "cheers love, have a brilliant time and hope everything goes really well".

Wear nice knickers... police advise binge-drinkers

as found in local paper, the Metro

"Don't flash when you're trashed
Thursday, July 13, 2006

Banish your Bridget Jones bloomers to the bottom of the drawer and wear your nice knickers when you go out. It sounds like advice from your best mate – but in fact it's from the police. The controversial message is included in a new magazine which encourages young women to cut down their drinking and be safe when they go out clubbing.

Making sure you have had a recent bikini wax is another prize tip from the first issue of safe! – published yesterday by Suffolk Police. In an article showing a girl passed out on the floor and flashing her bottom, fashion editor WK Dee says: 'For those of you intent on getting ratted this weekend, think. If you fall over or pass out, remember your skirt or dress may ride up. For all our sakes, please make sure you're wearing nice pants and that you've recently had a wax.

'Better still, eat before you go out, drink plenty of water in between bevvies or better still, don't get in this sorry state – it's not nice.'

The free eight-page guide also includes fashion tips, a problem page and horoscopes. Ch Insp David McDonnell said the magazine would be useful in the fight against anti-social behaviour."

my rock star weekend

Weekend before last i decided to go to london, partly coz i had to sort out some banking which apparently could only be done there, but also coz i wanted to check out the modernism exhibition on at the V&A museum, which was closing in a few weeks. i'd heard that there was a gig by a certain electro musician/dj who visited adelaide recently, who you have all heard me talk about, and who i shall refer to only as 't'.

so, i decided to call up t's agent so see if i could get a free ticket. met up with him and t on the friday night, for dinner at Ravi Shankar's restaurant - very unimaginatively called 'Ravi Shankar'. food was amazing though, vego indian, wayyy yummy. then i learnt that the gig was in exeter, a town about 3 hours drive west of london! but i must have caught him at a generous moment coz he invited me to go along with them to the gig! maybe he felt guilty coz he knew how much i had to put up with them in adelaide. i decided to abandon my very well-planned weekend in london and joined the t entourage.

the tour bus (van actually, disappointing) left on saturday morning, t decided he wanted brekkie so we stopped at a traditional english caff. almost full english with a mug of brickies tea.



FInally arrived in Exeter in the late afternoon, couldn't find the venue, nobody seemed to know where they were going. t woudn't have known of we had driven for 3 hours in the opposite direction (then again, neither would i). eventually found the hotel, which they were putting me up in as well, it was a poshy english boutique hotel.



I got verrrry excited when i heard that it was Michael Caine's hotel. I'm thinking, cool, possible celebrity sightings may ensue. However apparently there's another Michael Caine who is a minor celebrity chef in the UK. Not exciting.

Still the hotel was very nice, all big piles of cushions and rows of free little bottles of grapefruit-smelling toiletries (i took them all when i left). So we checked in, they all went up to the venue to check it out, I went shopping. They all did soundcheck and teched the venue. I had dinner, paid for with t's dinner allowance money. So far, a pretty damn good deal!

I rocked up to the gig and it turned out to be a community world music festival (term used very loosely) run (also used loosely) by a bunch of hippies. Bless them, they were trying hard, and they did manage to pull together a pretty reasonable lineup. But I really had to turn off my event manager brain, it was all a bit of a free-for-all. But I had a great time all the same, danced all night, t's playing wasn't that great, but he did had heaps of problems with the sound.

Next day had brekkie at the hotel (included with the room of course) - this time a real full english, I stuffed myself. We set off to go back to London. Next minute, the agent was like, oh, that's Stonehenge over there. Right-o.

I'd booked a flight back to Edinburgh from London leaving that night at about 6pm, there was only about 30 mins leeway in our schedule, and I HAD to get back coz i was starting my job the next day. Then t decides he wants to stop for lunch. All hopes of making my flight disappeared. He wanted to take us to the area that he grew up in, way out in west london, it was cool, seriously just like being in Delhi. Had the most amazing vego indian lunch, i think maybe the best i've ever had, complete with Bollywood films playing on a telly in the corner.

I've seriously never heard someone talk about themselves so much, and be completely unaware of it.

And I did miss my flight and had to catch a train instead, took ages and cost a packet and had to put on a happy smiley face to cover my exhaustion for my first day at work. And I had to book another trip to London the next weekend to do the things I had planned to do...

But it was so worth it.

lucy in the skye with... backpackers

My god thats the corniest title... anyway, this is a little story about our trip to the Isle of Skye...

I'm generally pretty dubious about those backpacker bus tours advertised at hostels, they're all a bit wacky and zany for me. But Bri and I had a reliable tip-off that the 3 day bus tour to Skye was a good one, so we signed up. We departed at 9am Sunday morning (way too early) with a tour group including was a mix of aussie, canadian, russian, south korean, german. Our tour guide Jamie was a Scotsman (who unfortunately doesn't wear a kilt whilst driving the bus like the other drivers apparently do, loses points for that according to Bri!), but he had gorgeous dry scottish sense of humour and a brilliant story-telling manner, recounting all sorts of tales of murder, rape and pillage from scottish history whilst driving us through the countryside.

First stop was Dunkeld to check out a 14th century cathedral, still operational, but with the back half in ruins.



It was so beautiful, complete with amazing chiming bells. I also managed to find a bakery nearby for a top class cornish pasty yummm! Drove through Inverness, and then on to Loch Ness, where Jamie invited us to take a dip in the (freezing cold) water. We all thought he was kidding until he stripped off to his shorts and waded in, only one other guy from Melbourne joined him - except for Nessie of course who was already in and waved hello to us ; )

Stopped at Urquart Castle and then Eilean Donan castle, which for all you 80's film fans is the setting of Highlander! (apparently of Die Another Day and Entrapment too hmmm). Finally arrived in Skye and checked into our hostel in Kyleakin, where we stayed for the two nights. Its a tiny town, no shops at all but 2 pubs of course. Spent the first night at the pub, ate a yummy fish supper of haddock and chips (yum again) and then Bri beat us all at countless games of pool.

This was the pub we DIDN'T go to...



Day 2 was a day trip around Skye, starting with us all dipping our faces in a creek, which as legend has it will make you beautiful (bring it on i say...). Strangely the South Koreans didn't join in, perhaps coz they thought they were beautiful enough already. But more likley they had absolutely no idea what Jamie was talking about and wondered what the hell we were all doing dunking our heads in the freezing creek at 9.30 in the morning.

Then wandered about Portree, Skye's capital, which had a pretty bay lined on one side with coloured houses...



We picked up some supplies for lunch, and had a yummy brunch of a real sausage roll and tiny perfect pineapple tart...



Strangely again, the South Koreans re-emerged on the bus carrying the most enormous packet of chips (crisps). It was almost bigger than them. Maybe you can't buy crisps in South Korea.

After a drive up to the north of the isle, we walked up into the hills for a picnic lunch surrounded by the crazy shaggy sheep and drank in the view.







Then stopped by the McLeod Castle, and got to explore this one from the inside. Wouldn't mind hanging out there for a while, althought the torture chamber didn't look too appealing. It was built next to the kitchen so the prisoners could smell the food being prepared for the fancy people upstairs, which they of course wouldn't be eating. so mean... Anyway, next visit was to a little valley called the Fairy glen, where everything is tiny - mini trees, little flowers, and a rocky outcrop they call the fairy castle. Hippie heaven!

Day three we made our way back to Edinburgh, past Ben Nevis - the highest peak in the UK and with a very bad rep (heaps of people die trying to climb it). Then to Fort William, where the Fort has now been replaced with a supermarket (!!) and to the William Wallace monument in Stirling.

We spent lunch in the valley of Glen Coe, a really beautful place which was the site of a horrible clan massacre. When climbing back after lunch, a busker completely kitted out started playing his bagpipes up at the top of the hill. The sound drifted through the valley was really spookily beautiful.



Scots are obsessed by cows and we stopped to meet Hamish the highland cow, poor thing was held in a pen near a main road and harrassed by tourists constantly. I have no idea why Hamish is so famous, there was a whole souvenir shop devoted to him. He was pretty cute though.



Got back to Edinburgh completely buggered, but it was a great few days, really worth doing. I did make a bet that I would go back to Lock Ness for a dip, but lets hope everyone forgets...

xx

och aye, its Auld Reekie

Well, I've arrived safe and well in Edinburgh... can't believe I've been here for two weeks already. The plane flight was pretty torturous, beginning with the 'suspicious package' found at adelaide airport that delayed my flight by 3 or so hours (of course it was nothing in the end). Flew straight through to Edinburgh, arriving bright and early on a Monday morning and with the most ridiculously swollen legs ever (think elephantitus of the ankles - truly disgusting).

Spent first few nights in a hostel, it was a great one - 20GBP for my own room an absolute bargain. Shame about the beer garden up the road that was holding regular boozy screenings of the World Cup, resulting in the occasional dumpster-upturning beneath my window in the middle of the night...

Last Saturday Bri and I moved into our flat... yay! Its just behind Calton Hill, about 15 minutes walk from the city centre. We're sorta house sitting for a bunch of aussie girls - none above the age of about 22 - who have headed off into a camper van for a few months to drive to portugal (hope someone tells them there's a bit of water inbetween). These chicks were seriously mingin (that's UK speak for dirty) (i mean dirty like as in not clean) (oh you know what i mean - matt this is your fault!!) Of course the flat was left in a pretty unfortunate state - my idea was to get a hose in and just spray the place down (bri wasn't so keen). Nothing that a few hundred hours of scrubbing couldn't fix. But, the rent is mega cheap (for the Ed summer anyway) and its close, so happy days...

here's the outside (the blue door is the entrance to the flats)



and the lounge



We of course made the obligatory trip to Ikea to help set up house...



rental flats over here are almost all fully furnished - wierd - but great, otherwise we'd be sleeping on the floor.

As for work, I have managed to win the job as Venue Manager for Assembly @ St George's West, an Edinburgh Fringe Festival venue hosting a bunch of shows. It's actually a church (which will still hold services on top of the stage on Sundays yikes) and its houses 2 Fringe venues, The Sanctuary and Candlish Hall. Check out the link for the list of the shows. Bri will be the Stage Manager for the venue too - we're hoping for some salsa lessons from the latin dancing people!! I start next Monday 10th July, and will work through til mid September. (Was hoping for another week to play in Edinburgh before starting work, but thems the breaks!) Should be a great gig, I'm very excited! (but quietly freaking too)

But to much more important things - the food. Its way better than I expected, but the Scots do love a bit of potato. Haven't ventured to black pudding or haggis world yet, but I have vowed that I will. (Apparently haggis is actually pretty good). Had dinner at the city Mosque with Bri and her brother Robin, a brilliant chicken curry for less than a fiver - yum! They will also deepfry anything not nailed down - mars bars, even haggis and even cheeseburgers! WTF! There's the old alcohol-in-the-supermarket trap to deal with too... gotta love it, but way dangerous.

Fave city fact so far? Edinburgh's nickname "Auld Reekie" which comes from back in the days when the city sanitation was so bad that you could smell the place from miles away. Luckily things are a bit better now... although the tourist season is only just beginning...

xx

got a bit of catchin' up to do...

first item of business, some pretty brill pics from farewell drinks. ohhhh the fun when alcohol, bad 90's music and digital cameras meet...